Rev. Maureen Cotton

Reverend Maureen Cotton is an Interspiritual minister, serving the spiritual-but-not-religious. She's on a mission to revive the understanding that a wedding is transformative rite of passage. Ready to get grounded in a meaningful wedding journey? Start with the with the popular Vow Writing Retreat.

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“We should have eloped.”

My friend, “We should have eloped,” is a common refrain among engaged (and even married) couples. Often it’s said as a joke in the face of wedding planning stress. Yet, even as a joke it begs a really important question: “Why are we doing all this?” You’re getting married. You’re celebrating all that you and your partner have become while setting the course for what’s next. It’s a beautiful, life-altering juncture to be at and live into. Yet… Week by week your free time is absorbed into long...

about 1 year ago • 2 min read

The risk of online dating

My friends, Have you ever dated online? Or fell in love with someone you met online? Or married someone that you met online? According to The Knot’s wedding survey, 29% of millennials who married in 2022 met online, but only 15% of Gen Z. Three side notes on that stat: (1) The Knot’s survey is limited to self reports via users of The Knot, so not a perfectly comprehensive picture, but it’s the biggest survey this industry has at present. (2) Millennials are currently 26-41 years old (high...

about 1 year ago • 4 min read

Why you have to/get to take the lead

My friend, Close your eyes for a moment and picture a group of people close to you. Some segment of your community anywhere from 10 to 50 people. Go ahead, I’ll wait… Got/had a vision? Question: Do you think all those people define and value marriage the same way? Almost certainly not. In a postmodern, multifaith, multicultural, individualist society, we do not have a shared definition of marriage. (Aside from the legal commitment—but guess what? Most engaged couples don’t even understand the...

about 1 year ago • 2 min read

'Why is he so woke?!'

My friend, A couple emails ago I shared about why I tell sad stories on wedding days. Essentially, if you dare to tell the true story of how and why your relationship evolved into this place of getting married, then you will have a Soulful Wedding—a day of profound joy and deepened understanding + connection that lasts decades after the wedding day. Phew—that is a big claim. And, after 15 years in the wedding industry, 11 years of marriage, and being a close witness to hundreds of marriages...

about 1 year ago • 4 min read

CHANGE MY MIND

Good Morning my friend, The Soulful Wedding* just accomplished a major goal! 🎉 On Tuesday night I finished the live pilot for my new course, Create Your Ceremony. (*At present, The Soulful Wedding is simply me and all my counter cultural ideas about what makes weddings truly worthwhile.) The course was awesome. The outcomes for couples were beyond my expectations. I have so much to tell you, including a follow-up to my last newsletter about powerful storytelling for wedding ceremonies. And, I...

about 1 year ago • 1 min read

Why I tell sad stories on wedding days

My friend! Tuesday night was the kick off to my new Create Your Ceremony course, and almost half the night was dedicated to couples revisiting and defining their own Love Story. One prompt had couples consider major new experiences they’ve had together or major changes they’ve seen each other through. These can be joyful or painful: Getting a puppy or losing a job. Standing at an awe-inspiring vista or losing a loved one. I encouraged couples to hold it all, even the painful stuff, to see...

about 1 year ago • 3 min read

No disappointed grandmas

My Friend, This week my interview on the popular The Big Wedding Planning Podcast was released. It was recorded months ago, so I was quite eager to hear what I talked about! It’s a joyfully informal podcast where Michelle (the host and wedding planner) and I built on each other’s ideas, even interrupting each other now and then. One such moment is when we were talking about incorporating religion into wedding ceremonies. I shared about guiding a Catholic couple to identify the most meaningful...

over 1 year ago • 2 min read

Your ceremony is the moment, don’t leave this until later

My friends, I just sent out my reflective questionnaire to couples already signed up for Create Your Ceremony—a live course through which you envision + outline the most amazing ceremony possible for you. (After the course, couples give this outline to their friend who is officiating; the friend can take it and personalize it even further, then can focus on nailing delivery. If you don’t have an outline for your wedding ceremony yet, grab your spot.) These questionnaires are Step One for you...

over 1 year ago • 1 min read

“How can we honor all 7 parents in our wedding ceremony?”

My friend, This week I caught up with Thalía and Valter. I created and officiated their spiritual, multilingual, interfaith wedding ceremony on top of a New Hampshire mountain on a glorious October day. Thalía found me on Instagram where she (reportedly) binged watched my post-ceremony live videos. At that moment in their wedding planning she says she was so disoriented that she could barely keep straight what happened during the reception and what happened during the ceremony. All she knew...

over 1 year ago • 3 min read

What is a Soulful Wedding?

My friend, If you’ve been to weddings then you know… You know how many of the events look and feel quite similar—despite how different the couples are. You know that some weddings leave you feeling spiritually full and believing in the power of love, yet others make you think "meh," or, “OMG enough already. I get it. You’re soooooooo in love.” The weddings that make everyone believe in and desire love? I call those Soulful Weddings. How are they created? Your wedding puts you at the center of...