My friend,

This week I caught up with Thalía and Valter. I created and officiated their spiritual, multilingual, interfaith wedding ceremony on top of a New Hampshire mountain on a glorious October day.

Thalía found me on Instagram where she (reportedly) binged watched my post-ceremony live videos. At that moment in their wedding planning she says she was so disoriented that she could barely keep straight what happened during the reception and what happened during the ceremony. All she knew was that she wanted their vows to be authentic and true, “the center of everything,” she said

When we began talking, one of the first things on her mind was parents. Together, they have seven parents. They wanted to honor them all without excluding anyone, or making them feel too put on the spot, or making anyone feel their toes being stepped on. It seemed an impossible puzzle to them.

There are infinite ways to honor parents during a wedding ceremony, from including moments with them in the telling of the Love Story, to explicitly verbalizing gratitude, to having an honoring ritual. We discussed anecdotes, flowers, hugs, candles, names, readings, spoken blessings, and more. We were also talking about a ring warming or handfasting ritual, alongside considering traditions from their Cape Verdean and Puerto Rican heritages.

Our conversation led Thalía and Valter to have a lot of searching conversations about family values. Thalia told me, “we have this huge, sprawling family network with parents and step parents, grandparents and step grandparents, siblings and step siblings and half siblings…. and not even everyone speaks the same languages. It can be hard to feel unified within that, but the ceremony created that for a moment. We found a way to honor all these relationships, they all felt a part of it, and we felt the blessing from all of them. It cemented something in my brain and between us by honoring all those relationships so fully.”

Valter jumps in to add, “Yeah, it’s like the moment of the ceremony was just how we want our married life to be. It’s not just us as a married couple on an island. We are part of this family giving and receiving support every day.”

Oooooooo, I gotta tell you how my heart and arms tingled when Valter said, “the moment of the ceremony was just how we want our married life to be.”

YES! Applause, please. Drop the confetti! That’s it, my friend. Your wedding initiates married life. So the important question is: what’s the suitable beginning to our married life?

Most couples become unmoored during wedding planning, just as Thalía and Valter had been. Many never really get anchored again. Even if they are enjoying planning the party, they often forget to make the decisions that align with the true purpose of the celebration—starting their marriage.

Your dream for your marriage is the soul of your wedding. That’s the understanding that underpins EVERYTHING I offer through The Soulful Wedding.

And, have you heard? The most budget-friendly way ever to work with me—to joyfully align your dream for your marriage and your wedding—is a one-time offering, and it’s starting on January 24.

It’s the live pilot of my Create Your Ceremony course. This is for you if your friend is going to officiate your wedding and you want it to be a moment of significance (not something slapped together from lots of Googling).

Couples participating will start with the reflective questionnaire that I offer all my couples. This alone is an invaluable exercise in connecting with your partner and the true purpose of your wedding.

I hope you’ll join me. Hit reply if you have any questions about the experience or the (many!) included resources.

Happy wintery Sunday my friend. ☀️❄️

Maureen

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P.S. Oops, I got excited and forgot to tell you how we honored those seven parents. We did a ring warming that only the parents participated in. We also invited an aunt and grandmother to offer blessings to the couple in their native Cape Verdean Creole and Spanish languages. I offered an inclusive spiritual centering that honored Thalía’s deeply held Christian values and Valter’s more personal spiritual inquiry. They also asked their community to make a vow…

These are just some of the elements that created an epically beautifully yet profoundly intimate ceremony. I’ll tell you more another time.

For now, if you want to create an awe-inspiring ceremony you better snag one of the final slots for Create Your Ceremony!

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